Writing Exercise: Said!





My ten year old came home yesterday jumping with excitement about the literary exercise that his class had been given.  They had been given 10 minutes as a class to come up with 100+ words to replace "said".  He put the challenge stick out there for hubby and I to beat it or even come close in only 10 minutes.  He didn't take into account that they worked in pairs and each pair only came up with about 30 words!


No Pressure!


Well,  it is incredible how the brain freezes in these moments with the ticking of the timer, the scratching of my hubby's pencil, yet in the end we managed to come up with 95 words to replace said (he had 45 and I had 40 - tell me why I'm writing and he is not?).  It is a great exercise and one I will repeat over and over (and I am keeping my hubby's words!).

Her Father's Daughter by Alice Pung



Alice, you have kept me awake into the wee hours of the night.  You have managed to put together yet another brilliant book, a memoir, a story of you and your father.  You are truly a brilliant writer.

Her Father's Daughter is a more serious book than her first book, Unpolished Gem, yet Alice's fragrant Australian, Cambodian, Chinese flavour flows so well with humour, dry wit and at many moments, the utter truth of the story that she carried me along this incredibly personal journey of her family.

Her Father's Daughter begins with Alice stepping off the bus in China, in the town that her family have come from, before Braybook, in Western Melbourne and before fleeing Cambodia.  She is wanting to understand her  roots, her father more.  Alice doesn't find what she expected in China, but when she returns and spends more time with her father, talking with him, listening to the stories, to the difficult stories of living the Black Bandits and having to flee death and persecution from the Pol Pot ("Political Potential") regime.  This part of the story is written in his voice and hers, allowing us to gain insight into what she thinks her father may have been thinking during during her time during university and beyond. This helps give some perspective to Kuan, her father, through his stories and those of his friends.

Alice tells the terrible story of the Year Zero so well, giving me so much understanding into the tragic unfolding of the events before and after 17 August 1975 when life as all in Phnom Penm knew it was to change forever.  She writes it in an incredibly respectful way that show the pain and loss the Cambodians went through as she follows the story of her father and his extended family from before Year Zero until they escaped to the refugee camp on the border of Thailand.

Many of those who made it out vowed that they would never set foot in that country again.  After reading what the people were put through, I can understand more clearly the trauma that they would have felt.   This story gives so much insight into the plight of so many people whose lives are suddenly turned upside down, and how this affects them forever.

Thank you again Alice for a brilliant, brilliant, brilliantly told story that was well worth being told.  10 / 10.

Kuan, thank you for sharing your story.

No need to rush things...



So, finally, as the first month comes to a roaring finish ("Already" I hear myself scream as I suddenly realise that I have a bill due TODAY that I forgot because today should be tomorrow, not today. How did that happen?), I have settled on my goals for the year.  I don't like to rush things.

 "Only Fools Rush In"

So, if you can bear with me, here they are, my goals, as I said in my previous post (mostly) SMART goals, laid out bare (some are quite boring mind you):

1. Write a review of each book I read (in a timely manner, not like the "Why Weren't We Told" by Henry Reynolds, which is staring at me, waiting for me to say something.  I think that it said so much to me that I am finding it difficult to review.  I just need to do it and stop putting it off).

2. Read 2 books per month (so far I have accomplished this.  Let's see if I can keep it up when it is not summer holidays)

3. Lower the migraines from over 15 days per month to less than 5 days per month.  This will take a lot of work on lifestyle, relaxation and drug management, good dedicated work, hopefully.

4. Shrink the waistline to 80cm or less (I had to have a "lose weight" one).

5. Fix up the bathroom and kitchen.  The tiles are falling off and we need some cupboards that have doors on them so I can stop looking at everything all the time.

6. Write at the library or cafe (ie not in the house) twice a week.  After 6 months of doing at home, I think that I now need to break it up a little. Out might be good.

7. Finish Dip of Project Management.  Once the kids go back to school, I might be able to think again, much higher chances of getting this done.

8. Exercise (ie cardio for 30 min) 3 times a week (yep, there it is again...)

9. Start a writer's group weekend retreat (perhaps quarterly) with some other likely characters.  There have been some murmurings with a friend from my Wednesday monthly group, so there is one, we may roll along and collect a couple more.

10. Spend some time in the garden every week.  It needs me, I need it.  We are co-dependants.

11. Start volunteering 1/2 day every week.  I have found a great group who work with Asylum Seekers and really need volunteers and am 2/3 through their training now.  Yippee!

12. Give some time back to me, by writing myself & things I want to do into the family calendar...we'll see how that goes...!

Twelve things, twelve months, how tidy is that?

Oh, one more to mess things up,

13. Get more organised, be more organised, put systems in place so that I am not covered in paper and surprised by late bills or other nasties... (Surely that is a given with yearly goals if you are not suffering from OCD).


Tra la la la... Here we go, into February!

The Summer Without Men by Siri Hustvedt



This is the first book that was selected for my book club this year, and when I first heard the title, my first feeling was of relaxation.  I was imagining a time of women sitting around exchanging ideas, being free of the shackles of men, dancing, rejoicing, reading books under the shade of a tree...and no mention of men.  In some ways, I was rewarded with this.  When my oldest son (12yrs) saw the title, he shuddered saying, "Urgh, I could think of nothing worse."  Well, there you go, I live in a house full of men, I would delight in it, I think.

This book is the follows Mia, the poet, and her ramblings (in a great way) as she tries to mend her shattered heart and mind.  She is coming to terms with her husband,  Boris, making the decision to have a "Pause" after 30 odd years.  A lovely young French woman aptly takes on the name in Mia's voice as "Pause", we learn nothing more of her.  Mia has been thrown so far from her place of comfort that she has a moment of temporary insanity whilst Boris takes up with the Pause.    To recover after her time in the hospital, Mia seeks shelter amongst women, her mother, her sister, teaching poetry to young teenage girls and doing book club with elderly women.  Through these interactions Mia begins to find her strength again as she reflects on her relationship and the damage that the Pause has had on her.  Her daughter Daisy desperately tries to pull her parents back together, like so many children of broken relationships do.  Siri deals with this reality so well.

In the elderly women (The Swans), Mia finds an unusual, yet lovely surprise in Abagail as secrets unfold in the most unusual ways.  Mia also finds herself in the midst of a  teenage whirlwind with a bad smell.  She uses what she knows best to work through this - writing.  It proves to be a very useful tool.

I loved the cross generational relationships in this book and how they are so important to each other, the wisdom, the youth, the reminders to each other and they can help each other.  Siri reminds us how important it is to have these cross generational relationships.

For a book titled "The Summer Without Men" I wasn't expecting so much referencing to the men in her life and other's lives.  Early on I found it distracting.  On reflection, however, this was the reality of Mia's life, Boris had been such an important part of her life, she could not live a summer with mentioning him, thinking of him every day.

The book itself is a great read and a short read.  Siri has Mia writing to the reader in a lyrical prose, best read quickly in longer sittings rather than little grabs.  I am looking forward to a re-read as I think that this book actually warrants it, and I now know that I will set aside the time to read it in large chunks than the little moments at bedtime that I did.

Man

The inspiration for this came from my lovely husband, who I do love with all of his crash banging around!  Love to know what you think. Cheers, Meg

Man
Big Hands
Squashing things,
Clumsy Fingers,
Breaking Glasses,
Chipping Plates,
Smashing Bottles,
Crash Bang

Man
Strong and bolshy,
Moving with thump and thud
Door shutting,
Pictures rattling,
Chair scraping
Like fingernails on a blackboard
Books chucked down
Bending covers and pages
Crash Bang

Man
A rough, loving kiss
Tightly hugging,
Bruising ribs with love
Slapping thigh with laughter,
Hand being held,
'Don't squeeze so hard'
Massaging,
Therapy.
Crash Bang

Man
Toilet seat flung
Whack
Toilet seat down
Whack
Crash Bang

Man
Made of giant
All delicates hiding
From big fingers and hands
Fragile old tea-cup found
Now balancing precariously
Between two fat sausages
With saucer waiting below
Quietly, patiently, not breathing
Lest the Man giant
Be broken from this
Gentle spell, for now.

Great Expectations and All That Nonsense



I usually begin each year with my set of goals for each of the areas in my life: health, learning, house, fitness, travel, and so forth, yet last year, I didn't.  I had no goals.  I began the year goal-free and survived.  I got through, I didn't necessarily kick huge successes, yet I didn't "fail" or fall in a heap.  I did feel at some stages, however, that I was floundering. There was no post out there for me.  I had to keep putting goal posts out there.

In the wash up I have taken a long time to "debrief" myself and my year as I have trawled through my diary, picking out the important bits, the quotes, the unfinished business (yes, I am still a paper-leather-bound-diary-no-ipod girl).  It has felt like an important thing to do after what has seemed like a really hard year.  A year that saw me grieving people, freedom, loss of innocence of my children as they get slightly older and more bolshy, loss of our tightly knit family unit that we had experienced the year before, accepting increase in pain (migraines, back and jaw) after a year of being relatively well managed (we travelled in the outback and bush for 9 months - read "freedom").  That being said, great things have happened along the way.  I got myself some great part-time work along the way after being out of the workforce for over a decade, I studied and completed a diploma (I have a history of never finishing courses for many reasons, none of which being that I didn't want to finish), I made the decision to spend more time writing, just writing (YAY!) and I was really happy to see my kids settle back in to schooling life after a nomadic year.

So, I have been debriefing, and realising that I actually need to set myself goals for the year otherwise I have a tendency to drift with the breeze and go with really short term goals.  I get frustrated with myself and that then filters through to my little family.

I am taking my time with this goal setting.  I no longer feel the pressure that I used to of the date 1 January.  For me now it is more about "Where am I now, and where do I want/need to be in a year's time?"

I have broken it up into the different areas of my life:





And as I am visual/colour person, I see each of these areas in different colours, and circles.  I have to pop them in circles and then write what I want/need to be in this year in these areas.  It is helping me to get some focus in this crazy world where my needs sometimes seem to be the last ones on the agenda.

So, from here, I have been trying to make some SMART goals (specific, measurable, achievable, realistic time bound) so that I am not either setting myself up for failure or not putting any challenge out there.  I think so often we put goals out there at this time of year that are unrealistic like, "I am going to deal with every piece of paper as soon as it comes into the house.  No piece of paper is going to lie on any bench." (yes, this was one of my goals one year), and then 3 months in, the bits of paper start to accumulate, a bit of self flagellation goes on, then give up...have set oneself  up for failure.    Probably more realistic for me would be to decide to set up a system to deal with the bits of paper.  I also think that it would unrealistic for me to set the goal of getting a book published this year, but I have to seriously look at how I can put the challenge stick out there for myself so that I don't get mushy and do nothing.  Goals are great for pushing me along, getting me out of my comfort zone.


I love the idea of getting to the end of the year and looking back at the goals with a smile and feeling like I have kicked some goals and grown within myself.

Watch this space as I continue to refine...

What are your goals, do you make goals, how do you go about it?  Cheers, Meg

The Versatile Blogger Award


As the new year dawned and I was preoccupied with my boys in sun and sand, Tiffany from My Peculiar Journey kindly gave me The Versatile Blogger Award for this blog.  I am humbled.  

The Rules for excepting the illustrious Versatile Blogger Award are as follows:

Thank the person who nominated you. Tell 7 things about yourself, so that your readers may learn more about you, and nominate 15 other newly discovered bloggers, then let them know you nominated them.

Here are 7 things about myself

1. I love silence.
2. I like to figure stuff out myself before looking at the instructions, instructions are for when things haven't worked out.
3. I play the flute.
4. I read until I fall asleep - every night (and drive my husband insane).
5. I am at peace when I am in the garden with my fingers in the dirt, I love to grow vegetables and local indigenous plants and write about them.
6. I love to create things from scratch
7. I am a naturally messy person, I have to work continuously at being tidy.

And most importantly nominate 15 other newly discovered bloggers.

For the moment I have chosen 13 blogs for various reasons (some are well into their blogging life and I really enjoy what they offer to me and I am sure to many, many others and have not yet received the award, others are fairly new, but I really like what I think that they have to offer) and will choose the other 2 as I find them (if I do).

The last one on the list has stated recently she may not be back this year.  I think that she really deserves the award anyway due to the wonderful blog that she has done and I wish her the best.





Thanks again Tiffany for thinking of my little blog this award :) 

Good Dog Bad Dog, One Lost Child



This is something that I wrote in my WednesdayWorkshop with Emilie Collyer. The probe was to write a poem as if it was a newspaper article or vice versa, not to think too much, and to go with the first idea.

I was really struck with something I had read in the paper that morning (and when it had happened) and a kerfuffle at the Sunshine Magistrates Court the day before with loads of media there (not really sure that this is what they were there for, however it did make me think of this family).

Family rallies around torn shreds of child
Mauled by dog
Now held on rod
Community now ripped apart
Good dog and bad
The owners are barking out loud
Foam frothing at mouth

Reports flow in from o' abroad
The barking gets louder
With teeth all bared
Men in suits murmur
And shake their heads
Conflicting thoughts, O', what to do

A family now with one less to hold
Stands closely with their dark skin
Fled had they from war torn lands
To be free from suffering 
And Warlord Kings
A bark now frightens them more than they could 'er know

Good dog, bad dog
Who will know.

Time to think about gifts and all that jazz



I went to the osteo this morning, as I tend to about once a month or so for a chin wag and so that he can put my neck, back & jaw back into place, and we got onto the topic of Christmas.  He was talking about a study he had just heard about by St Vincent de Paul who found that a huge number of people get given really crappy, junky presents that they really didn't want anyway and would have rather have been given a charity present.

I think that it is a really timely reminder as I have a few (well quite a lot) of nieces & nephews, kris kringles to do, and it is really easy to just get a "junky-little-something", when it just ends up in the bin the next week.  There are so many options now to do better than that.  There are second hand fantastic gifts to give, there are charity gifts that are giving money to the charity to do something wonderful with, and a token (maybe a card, or a pin, etc) for the person.





Oxfam, World Vision and Tear are some of the bigger ones that provide us with "really useful gift ideas" that won't clutter up people's houses with another ornament that they don't want and I am sure that if I keep scratching the surface (or surfing the net) there will be a bunch more.  Just find the one that speaks to you most.  There are also some great toys and other gift ware that are made by people in third world countries and the money will go straight back into their communities - fair trade choices.  If you don't like shopping on the internet, there is always the Community Aid Abroad shops.  They always have great stuff, then there are the local school art fairs, or local art/farmers markets or local shops that stock well made things.  

I think that given the state of affairs in the world right now, giving less presents that mean more may mean that it is a slightly more important Christmas present.


Reading by Moonlight: How Books Saved a Life by Brenda Walker, reviewed




"This whole plot, - the beginning, middle and end - had been lived before by others, but I had to live through it myself to understand it, to know that agony can be an analgesic, that the memory of pain can itself be a painkiller. " Paul Theroux in The New Yorker as quoted in Brenda' book

Brenda Walker's book, "Reading by Moonlight: how books saved a life", is ultimately about Brenda's journey of breast cancer, from the beginning, through the middle to the end, living it and learning about it, and in particular, her reading journey through, or to be more precise, her memory of the books that she has read over her lifetime that in some way served to help her through this treatment to survival. She tells of her truthful pain and decisions that a woman must make along the way during the process of the treatment (like the decision of whether or not to get cosmetic surgery or not).

It is a very heavily reference novel with at least 52 references to books or publications throughout the book that are in sometimes in such detail that they detract from her very well structured and heartfelt story.  The references that she uses, whilst they are all very relevant to her journey and story, at times, seem to be fleshing it out a little too much and making this piece of writing a little bit self indulgent, showing off how well read she is.  In many ways, this feels like an academic piece, an English literature book, one that I should be taking notes on (I did), which explores all of these books in relation to her circumstances.

Where it fails most, I think is that she has not given enough context of herself.  I was left with a sense of hollowness of who she was, without a depth of her son and a real sense of her place, where she lived.  I  I didn't get a real feel for where she was other than in the west of Australia, which is a big state.  Her son, once introduced, was lost, forgotten.  I was left wondering about the impact that this had on him.  I am aware that she wanted to write about the books, but the personal, emotional journey is important to the reader to.

Where Brenda did really well was to give a fantastic insight into the process of breast cancer treatment, the difficulty of it, and that through the distraction of books and readings she was able to survive and to look forward not back and be grateful, or as Robinson Crusoe said, "I am here, not there."

_____________________________________________________________________________

We read this for our book club, and the scoring in our book club was from 2/10 - 6/10.  Most felt that the quotations were arduous, and a distraction to the story.  A couple really enjoyed the references and the re-storytelling of them that Brenda did of them.  Brenda highlighted how incredibly wellread she is and most of the book club had wished that she have given more of herself to the book rather than her book reviews.

Have you read it?  What did you think of it?